Joy to the World

Christmas was wonderful, crazy, tiring, and did I say crazy?  Brendan isn't at the age where he understand what's really going on, but he did pretty well for not even being 2 yet!  Christmas Eve morning we celebrate with my parents at our house.  Brendan was pretty receptive to all of the presents and toys and delicious breakfast (I'm pretty sure he liked my homemade coffee cake more than the presents).  Christmas Eve afternoon and evening was spent at my aunt's house, where B was slightly bored with everyone opening presents, but was still pretty into opening presents.

Christmas Day morning was spent opening presents, just the three of us, followed by spending the day at Charlie's parents.  Christmas morning was very overwhelming for B.  It seemed as if the day before had been enough for him.  He opened his first present, and when asked to open another, he screamed "NO!" and then layed down on the floor.  He got over the tantrum fairly fast and continued to open, but he knew he needed a break!  Overall it was successful.  It wasn't what a pictured, but it was good.  I'm hoping that next year will be even better and he'll be even more into it.  (I'm especially hoping I'm not super sick next year either!)  I just need to remind myself how very blessed I am and it doesn't really matter how "perfect" the day went.  We got to see B smile and begin life's journey of experiencing the magic of Christmas, we ate like pigs, and we visited with family.  We are blessed.

I ended up taking 180 pictures between the 2 days and deleted about 35, but here are a few of my favorites...

Eve morning with Grandma & Grandpa River

Hot Wheels excitement

And we didn't even coordinate on purpose

Mickey love

Handy Manny excitement

Hiding in his tent with Mickey and new pillow

Bristle blocks!

He stopped and read his new books for about 15 minutes

Christmas morning 2010

Help from Uncle Mike

His very own couch! (and it pulls out!)

Unwrapping with Grandma V

Sledding

So, several days before Christmas, the 21st, a new blanket of snow had fallen and the hill in our side yard (out the front door) was primed for sledding.  B's first time sledding (at 21 months)!  I was sick and B was semi-sick, however, we needed to get some fresh air and the temperature was just right.  Besides the fact that I felt like I was dying, it was the perfect time to do it.  Or so we thought...  B sobbed uncontrollably while putting on his snow gear.  He was acting as if we were taking him out to the middle of nowhere and leaving him there!  It took a very long hug and some soothing words (and then some enthusiasm) and we were on our way!

He couldn't wait to get in his swing!

Mom and B heading down!

He was more concerned about the snow on his mitten.

Dad's turn with B!

Watching B walk around his slightly too big snow boots was pretty classic, well, for us, not him.  He was getting very frustrated, very fast.  He was happy to be out on the plowed driveway where he could walk!  We'll have to go sledding again, I don't think any park sled hills are in our immediate future, we'll be sticking to the hill in our yard for now.

These mittens aren't letting me do anything!

Easier to crawl!

Time to go in...

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...

Helping decorate the tree

I love Christmas and this Christmas is no exception.  It is official that I am more excited for Christmas than B is, but that's only because he really doesn't understand what's going on, not yet anyway.  Every day, a few times a day, I get his attention and talk about baby Jesus and Santa, but I condense it down to about 3 very simple sentences.  I'm hoping that maybe some of it will start to sink in.  I will never forget B's face when I first explained Jesus and then Santa, we were grocery shopping at Meijer and he was getting cranky, so I distracted him with a few of these sentences...the look on his face was a cross between "hmmm, tell me more mom" and "mom, you are crazy".  I think it was the part about a man named Santa leaving him presents/toys under our tree at home...  He adores anything baby, so he seemed excited about this baby Jesus guy...

B loves our tree, he was 100% confused the day we went to get it, and when we brought it into the house.  His face lit up and the smile stayed plastered on his face for a full 2 minutes when I turned on the lights on the tree for the first time.  We thought that if B helped with the ornaments, had ownership, then he'd be more likely to not destroy the tree and/or ornaments all the way through Christmas.  It started off quite well, I opened the first container of ornaments and B immediately spotted my Donald Duck ornament from when I was younger and yelled, "Donald!", so that was the first ornament to go on...then he found Big Bird and was loving the whole concept.  He really could care less about his special ornament series that we started for him last year, but then he spotted the colored glass ornaments that my great Aunt Alice crocheted around and exclaimed, "ball!", he picked up the ornament and threw it to the ground.  Thank goodness it didn't break, but B had a forced break for awhile after that.  He's been pretty good around the tree, but he has his moments, like last night, when he took his Nerf baseball bat and started poking/hitting the tree.  He does love to point at the ornaments and tell us what they are:  "baaaa" (sheep), "Donald", "bike", "baby", "house".  Did I mention that I can't wait until Christmas!?

Hmm...which one next?

Carefully placing Donald...

B's 2010 ornament

Here's a good spot!

The final product

We haven't visited Santa, but I do believe that we'll be seeing him on Monday down at Macy's after eating at the Walnut Room with my in-laws.  (Which, I've never been, I'm quite excited!)  I can't wait to get some pictures of him with Santa, I know there are going to be some tears!

Like this awesome picture I captured while trying to take Christmas card pictures...

I'm done with pictures mom...

Even though he's upset, it still makes me chuckle every time I see it...this is a much better one...

My angel

Manners, Numbers, and Parking Lot Tantrums

"Don't lick Mommy and Daddy's floss!"   Just one of the many sentences I thought would never leave my mouth.

Moving on...
Teaching manners to Brendan is high up on the list of things I need to show him.  So far he has "pees" down very well, in fact he uses it when not prompted.  Now to teach him that just because he says please doesn't mean he'll get what he's asking for...hmmmm.

B is a boy after my own mathematician heart!  He loves counting and numbers (I mean, who doesn't!?)!  He counts items when we go to the grocery store or if we're playing outside and even while we're driving and passing cars.  It's exciting!  Granted, he doesn't quite understand that the numbers represent amounts yet, but that'll come with time.  However, he recognizes specific numbers.  We have a really cute retro Fisher Price clock toy and as I was sitting at the computer, B sat on the floor next to my chair and pointed at the number 3 on the clock and said "three", pointed to the 4 and said "four", he did 5 and 6 too!  However, 7 was "six".  8 was "eight", 9 was "nine"...and so were 10, 11, and 12.  It was amazing to see him do this, mainly because I have no idea what is "average" for this age.  He could be "behind" or he could be "ahead" and I couldn't care less!  It just makes me so happy to see him learning, it's truly awesome to watch him grow.  Now if we can only get him to see that not everything is "blue".

And moving on to more trying issues...
We went to the grocery store for 6 items, just a quick trip to the store after his nap today.  The ride there was nice, we talked about all of the cars and trucks we saw (and the fruit snacks helped too), the store wasn't too bad, he's been better and he's been worse.  The parking lot was not good.  Not good at all.  Now I do know that this is completely normal toddler behavior and it's just a phase, but it really, really sucks!  I had one grocery bag in one hand and I was carrying Brendan in my other arm, when he decided to squirm so hard that if I didn't let him down he was going to drop like a cement brick, so I let him down.  He loves walking and holding my hand while in parking lots, so no big deal, but apparently this was not pleasing him at the moment.  He promptly threw himself to the ground...in a puddle...and screamed.  I stood there and waited, not saying a thing, and not enjoying the looks I was getting.  I waited for him to get up and then took his hand again, he gave a stellar repeat performance.  So I picked him up like sack of potatoes and fought to get him in his car seat.  I was sweating by the time it was all over.  He then wanted the rest of the fruit snacks and asked for "more" when I got into the front seat.  I turned around and just gave him this look and said super calmly, boys who are bad don't get fruit snacks.  My look must've meant business because he was quiet the whole way home.  When we pulled into the garage, I turned to look at him and he blew me a kiss and I swear he said sorry.  God love him.

What the Ladybug Heard

I have read What the Ladybug Heard by Julia Donaldson every day, 2-3 times a day for the past 2 weeks.  B is absolutely enthralled by this book.  I saw it displayed at the library and quickly flipped through it so I could see if it was something he'd sit through.  I saw that it had animals and animal noises and was sold.  I was a little hesitant because I saw that it had longer text on some of the pages, but I've been trying to get B into books that have a stronger storyline/plot.  I LOVE this book.  It's clever and has the requisite animals and animal noises that B absolutely loves. 

When we're not reading, B is loving his trucks and cars.  Definitely a boy.  Watching him physically and listening to him gets more and more fun each day.  His vocabulary is expanding (Why was I worried?!  Silly me.) every day and it cracks us up every day.  I want to be an honest mom (other than Santa, etc. of course) and want him to know about our bodies as he starts to question.  I was still wearing my pajama top this morning at breakfast and I leaned over and B looked right down my shirt, and asked, "this?" and pointed down my shirt.  Do I tell him the name or not?  Does it matter at 20 months old?  I decided to be this "honest" mom I want to be and told him that they were breasts.  I don't want to use cutesy nicknames for both male and female anatomy.  He thought about it for a second and then said "bests".  Hmmm...kind of cute, but scary all at the same time.  Watching him explore and discover everything in this world is amazing.  Being able to watch him wonder, explore, learn, and have fun makes up for his nasty tantrums...well, it at least helps me to forget them for a short awhile.  Oh, the tantrums.  THE TANTRUMS.  The frustration he feels when we don't understand what he's trying to tell us or the frustration he feels when I say no to another episode of Word World always ends in him hitting me or trying to bite me.  After he hits/bites, he walks away and then turns right back around and gently pats me and promptly kisses me.  As if to say, I was really frustrated, but I really didn't mean it mom. 

At 20 months B absolutely loves puzzles.  I recently acquired the Melissa and Doug animal sound puzzle.  Oh my, does he love it!  Best Pampers reward ever!  He does all sorts of puzzles and I can't wait till he can do the more advanced jigsaw puzzles!

B is getting a little less shy at playdates.  It still takes him awhile to warm up, but I'll take a little progress over none!

I'm not liking this whole getting colder thing and it being dark at 4:00...it's just wrong!  Knowing that we won't be going outside as much or for as long is really disappointing.  We'll still play outside, but when it's 40 degrees outside, it really loses its appeal!  Now that B loves being outside, this winter is going to be hard.  At least 5 times a day, B grabs my shoes and his shoes and puts them by the garage door and asks for "side".  He also doesn't quite get the whole "we can't go outside, it's raining" thing.  Talk about tantrums when we say no to outside!

B's eating is still driving me nuts, especially the milk issue.  I want him to get that Vitamin D that's so important!  I hate giving gummy vitamins, he should just eat the good food, geez!  If it were only that simple. 

What a rambling mess of information.  I want to track and record all the awesome (and not so awesome) things that B says and does, so I can look back and compare when a sibling arrives or look back 16 years from now when he's getting ready to head off to college.  I know that I can't capture everything in print (my lack of logging in and blogging is proof of that) and I can only pray that my memory holds more than I think it will.  I don't want to forget a single thing about this amazing little guy.

Repeat

Our schedule is mostly on repeat.  Brendan thrives on his schedule and becomes very upset when we start books and he hasn't brushed his teeth yet, he sits there pretending to brush his teeth, as if saying "hello mom, you have to brush my teeth, duh!".  Our days are very similar, the differences involve which store or park we visit each day.  I get so excited when there is a play date on the calendar; I love play dates, especially ones that involve going to someone's house.  Brendan is incredibly shy and clingy at 19 months.  If we go somewhere or to someone's house he will spend about 45 minutes to 1 hour clinging to me and just wanting to sit in my lap.  Seeing the other kids playing doesn't draw him in, he just wants to sit and observe.  It's driving me nuts!  So I've been taking him to as many play dates as possible to get him used to it and hopefully he'll become less shy and clingy.  Out of all the kids we play with  at any given time (a group of about 18), no other child is like that!  I shouldn't compare, but it worries me that he's not trying to be mr. independent like the other kids, some of which are his age exactly or a few months younger.  Even when the play date is at our house, he won't leave my side...ugh.

B is trying to talk more and more and it's even more frustrating than before, I so want to be able to understand him and I'm sure he'd love for me to understand him too!  He has acquired more words and that is very exciting...boy oh boy, is he ever a little parrot!   "Peas" (please) is my new favorite.

B eats non-stop...seriously...he's constantly saying "more".  When he is full he does tell us, so I'm not worried about turning off his natural "stop eating" switch, but where does this kid put it!?  And he stays so skinny (at his 18 month check-up his weight was in the 5th percentile, while his height was in the 85th percentile)!  Once upon a time I had that kind of metabolism, then freshman year of college happened.  His absolute favorite is "za" (pizza), he will eat 3 pieces of a thick DiGiorno frozen pizza...that's how much I usually eat...yikes!  And he thoroughly enjoys his string cheese (heaven forbid I cut up pieces of a brick of mozzarella cheese, no, that won't do) and yogurt.  He'll go absolutely gaga over cupcakes and cookies, good golly.  The way he gets excited for a cupcake is the way I get excited when my coffee is done brewing, (and well, it's how I get excited for a cupcake too).  It's a good thing he'll eat the cheese and yogurt every day and doesn't get tired of it because he's back to not liking milk.  About one week ago I stopped giving him his 6 oz. bottle of milk when he first woke up, before breakfast.  I showed him that the bottles were gone and that he had a special Mickey milk straw cup (he was super excited about the Mickey aspect of it), I poured milk right into it with him there.  I handed him the cup, he took a couple of pulls of it, then made a face, shoved the cup back in my face, and said "sha".  I'm thinking that "sha" is his swear word.  So he watched his morning Mickey without any milk and was okay, he had no tantrums or anything...which is great.  I expected a major meltdown with no bottle.  He must be punishing us though, because now at his meals (when I used to give him milk) he won't drink the milk at all.  He might take one sip thinking it's his water and then throw it over the side and say "sha".  He would rather be incredibly thirsty than drink milk during his meals or any other time for that matter.  UGH.  I even tried chocolate milk one morning with his breakfast...the response?  "SHA!"  Yeah.  I don't get it.  The doctor had said that it was fine, just make sure he's getting his calcium elsewhere.  Fine.  But I really like the idea of him drinking milk!  All the other kids drink milk and enjoy it and ask for it!  He asks for his "dree" (drink, which equals water).  I keep offering the milk every few meals, so he understands it's not going away.  I sure hope he likes milk in the future.  I wish he could talk and tell me what's going on.

And B cannot get enough Mickey, planes in the sky, or balls, oh and trucks...loves trucks.  Yup, he's a little boy :)

Belly button, belly button you're oh so fine

So, most kids attach to a blanket or a stuffed animal when they're young and use it as their comfort object....not Brendan.  He's never had anything like that...until now and it's his belly button.  Instead of reaching for a soft blanket or a cuddly animal, he reaches for his belly button (his thumb is just a given).  So when he's tired or scared or anxious, he lifts up his shirt and plays with his belly button.  I don't know what to make of it.  I guess I don't ever have to worry about him losing it or having to throw it in the wash, so I have that going for me.  It's just. so. odd.   I felt I needed to make note of this, so I can look back and remember, so then I can tell his first girlfriend when she comes over, lol.

So he has his belly button comfort object, which is fine, as long as he's not 15 and lifting up his shirt to play with it.  However, a problem has arisen...B likes to reach into his diapers (now this is really something to tell future girlfriends) and play with himself...very normal, not worried, not bothered.  The problem is that he is left facing up and we've had several leakage accidents.  (He sits there with his hands down his pants and looks like a miniature Al Bundy.)  So I've been having to put B in undershirt onesies underneath his outfits and put him into one-piece pajamas too.  This makes him very frustrated because he can't get to his belly button.  Oh dear.  And I thought I had it good with him using his belly button as a comfort object.  He'll just have to deal with the onesies because I'm not cutting a little hole out for his belly button.  Hahahaha, that image just made me laugh.

It's baaaaack...

Teething is back, and with a vengeance...B's "last" teeth are coming in, the bottom two canines...yikes!  I say "last" because it should be the last for awhile, until his 2-year molars start coming in, but luckily the canines are supposed to be the worst.  If B's behavior hasn't been stellar as it is lately, let's just throw this into the mix, ugh!  I will say, that even though B has been pretty awful lately, he is still really good around other kids.  Aren't we lucky that he takes it out on us?!  B will say hi to other kids (with and without prompting) and does share his toys.  In fact, around other kids he can tend to be a bit shy; it usually takes him quite awhile to warm up to the new place and people while we are on play dates, even when they take place at our house!

We've gone to a few apple orchards in the area to check out what they have to offer.  Both orchards were a lot of fun.  B absolutely loves donuts.  He freaks out at the sight of them or just the mention of them.  The orchard we went to yesterday as the BEST donuts ever.  They are given to you warm; nice and crunchy on the outside, soft, warm, and chewy on the inside...covered in cinnamon/sugar.  They are heavenly.  We plan on going back one more time before they close for the season....they're that good, plus the free activities there are awesome too!  We did try the pony ride because B showed interest and wanted to get on.  So we paid the $4 and we went around twice before he started freaking out and wriggling out of the "seatbelt", it was awful.  This is where the cranky teething came in.  He was miserable, gnawing on his fingers.

To sum up, we won't be going for a pony ride until next summer, after he's turned 2.  After that fiasco, we decided it was time to enjoy some warm donuts!

B also enjoyed seeing all of the different animals there.....

Where to begin...

Wow, it's been a month since I've posted.  This is due to the fact that I'm way too tired at the end of the day and just didn't have the energy to talk about my little maniac.  Recalling it all would just make me that more tired.  I wanted to blog our trip to the cottage and several other things, but oh well, I'll try to be more diligent in the future.  During the day I plan what I will write so that it's easier and faster when I sit down to do it in the evening, but I just never sit down to do it.  Brendan is more than energy sapping, he is a force to be reckoned with...I can only hope and pray that it can't get much worse.  I'm sure he's right on par with many other toddlers, but today I jokingly described him as the "devil in disguise".  Maybe I wasn't joking, who knows.  Brendan spends a lot of time in the time-out chair (thank goodness it has buckles) at 18-months-old.  He loves to hit, and it's not just the "I'm so frustrated that we can't communicate, so I'm going to hit you" hitting, it's to hurt us.  Seriously.  He knows exactly what he's doing.  He's seen that it actually hurts us, I've literally cried from the pain and said ouch.  He sees this and just laughs, and he continues to do it.  He slaps HARD for a little guy.  It's so frustrating.  As the doctor said, don't react (oh my goodness, that has to be THE hardest thing in the world to do), tell him simply no hitting (or pulling down the vertical blinds), and put him in time-out.  Don't over-explain and don't hug him or explain anything when the time-out is over, just unbuckle him.  Well, I'm not reacting and I'm consistently putting him in time-out.  It's a battle that I WILL WIN.  Hitting like that is unacceptable.  What's even more frustrating is that he is laughing hysterically as we put him in time-out. 

Tonight while bringing him from the bathtub into his room to get diapered and pajamas on, he grabbed the chunk of skin underneath my eye and held onto it with a death grip.  He was pulling the skin and gripping so hard, I couldn't see, literally.  I wanted to react.  I wanted to scream.  I wanted to spank him.  I wanted to just leave him right there and leave.  But I didn't.  I didn't react.  I told him to please let go and I tried to distract him with a song.  I didn't cry even though the pain was awful, I just wanted to burst into tears, but I didn't.  As I sit here typing, it still hurts, and it's making me sad and frustrated all over again.  He's just so intense.  He is so strong willed.  It can be confusing because at times he's the sweetest boy in the world, giving me big, sloppy kisses on the lips and blowing me kisses just because.  But it seems like the sweet boy appears less and less and his evil twin is appearing more and more. 

I'm telling myself that it's just a boy toddler phase that he's going through right now and that it will pass.  I also pray to God for extra strength, extra patience, and extra understanding.  And I remind myself that he is a gift and I'm blessed to have him, because I know so many people who are trying so hard to have a baby and keep miscarrying, and I think about my friends who lost their 9-month-old son.  So even though B is awful 80% of the time, I am thankful to have him in my life, because I really couldn't imagine my life without him.

I will say that watching him grow is amazing.  The new words that come out of his mouth crack me up and excite me, "mihee" (Mickey, as in Mickey Mouse), "shoe", "keys", "chee" (cheese), "dow" (down), "oo" (poop), "wow", "whoa", "ow", and a bunch of others that I can't recall at the moment.  Oh! "choo choo" is very cute, and so is "boat".  It's fun to watch him explore and discover things.  And the things he mimics are too cute.  He's a little person, a little me!  The vacuuming, the wiping of his mouth with a napkin, the every day things.  I was driving and I've become very tame in how I talk in the car, the worst I now say is "geez" (even though I'm sure it comes out very angry), my little parrot in the backseat repeats after me, "geez!". 

He went down at his normal time (7:00) and is still awake right now at 8:15, banging his feet against the crib slats, making it sound like he has an elephant in bed with him.  He must be over tired...hardly any napping and a lot of food and running around at a forest preserve all day must've done it to him, at least he's not screaming and crying.  (I'm dreading moving him to a toddler bed.)

That was a long post, but a very cathartic one, hopefully it gets me back on track with blogging.

Books and Tooshie Time

B still can't get enough of his books and reading...which makes this mama very happy and proud!  He would happily trade going outside for sitting in my lap and reading book after book (well most of the time, sometimes those parks do win over!)  We read 3-4 books at each nap time (morning and afternoon)  and then 5 books at bedtime and he just loves it and looks forward to it each time!  If he's struggling to get PJ's on or during a diaper change, we just need to mention books (I wish that worked for every tantrum!) and reading them...it's cute.

Some of his favorites at the moment (mainly anything involving babies and animals, he's happy)

Moo Baa La La La by Sandra Boynton (Actually, anything by Sandra Boynton he loves--especially Snuggle Puppy and The Belly Button Book
(he can now "read" the book himself, his favorite part is saying "lalala" and "no no")

Ten in the Bed by Penny Dale
(good ol' repetition!)

Wake Up, Big Barn by Suzanne Chitwood

(the pictures in this book are beyond cool, that's why I like it so much, she used different materials/items to collage together to make the big picture, I'm sure there is a name for this, but I don't know it...)

And of course he loves Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See?, The Very Hungry Caterpillar, and Oops!, and a million others...but these are his current go-to books...

We let him choose the last book at bedtime and it's the cutest (and longest) process in the world.  He gets off our lap and pulls a book slightly off the shelf so he can see which one it is and then says "noo" (in a way that makes him sound like he's just saying, "nah, not this one right now"), he repeats this a few times, and occasionally pulls a book completely off the shelf flips through a few pages, then says "noo" and puts it back on the shelf.  When he finally finds the book he'd like to read, he hands it to me and climbs back into my lap.  Sometimes I find myself saying, "if you don't pick a book now, I'll pick one for you!"...as if that works.

The time-out chair has been getting more tooshie time lately.  B loves to whip around and play with the vertical blinds on our patio door, he makes it so they all go out of place, which is driving me nuts!  He has all of these great toys and books and he's playing with the blinds...probably because he knows it drives me nuts!  So I've been very consistent about telling him no and then if he continues, 2 minutes in the chair.  He really hates the chair after about 45 seconds...so he doesn't go near the blinds again until too many hours have passed that he doesn't really remember the wrath of the chair.  A few times he has gotten out of the chair and run over to the blinds, reached out to "touch them", looked over at me and smirked, then pulled back his hand and runs away...  He pretends that he is going to touch them!  Really?!  At 17 months...good gosh, what's in store when he's two?!

B is saying more words, but do animal noises count?  His newest acquisition is "Baaaaa" for sheep and anytime there is a sheep on Mickey Mouse Clubhouse or in a book or he sees his toy sheep, we hear Baaaa for minutes and minutes.  For some reason, for zebra, he says "z z z z z"...what sound does a zebra make?!

B seems to be getting pickier and pickier with his food, *sigh*.  He will eat the following with no problems...packaged fruit cup (pears, peaches, cherries combo), string cheese, Gerber cheetos, hot dogs, sausage, sandwich (grilled cheese or jelly), and yogurt.  He'll eat the following most of the time:  banana, green beans, crackers, pasta.  I'm starting to lose patience with this whole eating thing!  It'll be interesting to see how he continues on the eating path and how a sibling will be compared to him.

The amount of tantrums has increased, but somehow he knows how to balance out my frustration with giving me a random hug and kiss...he's already working the system...

Take it to the limit, one more time

My life has become this very Eagles song, at least the title is my life.  Brendan is taking it to the limit ALL day long, every day!  How, at 16 1/2 months, does he know how to push my buttons so well?  Why does he test every LITTLE thing?  B and I are too similar it's scary and it's going to be a battle of the wills all the way.  I'm stubborn (which, when sticking to my punishing guns, is a great thing) and he's stubborn (he makes it through punishments unscathed).

Brendan is a really bright boy, I mean really bright, and not in that "oh my son is so fantastic because he's my son" mentality.  He's too bright for his own good (or at least my sanity).  I have never been so flummoxed by something that I love so much.  And when B pushes the limits, I can't take it.  My patience can only be spread so thin.  He is "naughty" all day long and he KNOWS IT!  That's the part that gets me every time; he just looks at me with this smirk as he throws every piece of pizza on the floor from his high chair tray, or as he throws every lotion bottle of his changing table/dresser, or as he rams the high chair into the painted wall repeatedly.  Our house is safe for Brendan to roam around, but what do you do when he uses safe things to be Mr. Destructor?  Toys, chairs, high chairs all become his next victim.

B finally learned how to climb onto the couches and onto a bench we have in our entryway.  Fun developmental step for him!  He stands on the couches and tries to STEP down and then leans over the back of it because he's trying to find a way down.  We have been practicing how to get off the couch (turn to tummy and slide down) since he started crawling and now that he can climb up, he seems to have forgotten this.  The other day he climbed up on the bench and was "stuck".  I was tired of him climbing up and not being able to get down, so I decided to engage in a battle of wills.  It wasn't wise that it was 10 min. to bedtime, but oh well.  I sat on the floor (with my camera that takes video) in front of the bench to monitor the situation and waited until he got down the correct way.  He kept wanting my "ha" (hand) to help him step down.  I refused.  I waited.  I cheered.  I motivated (do you want to play with the laptop sitting right here?).  I explained.  I demonstrated.  I did not give in.  30 minutes later I figure we should really get his bedtime started.  He's crying at this point.  My heart is breaking.  I must be strong though.  I finally had to help him sit down, turn him onto his tummy, and then get him sliding backwards.  He didn't seem to hate me too much, since the rest of the evening went smoothly, if you don't count him trying to get up from the changing table every 2 seconds in order to reach the bottles just so he could throw them on the floor (and as I struggled with lotion and PJ's and got more and more frustrated, he just laughed hysterically---like a mad scientist).  I have some classic video of this endeavor, but probably shouldn't post it, since someone might think it's toddler torture and call DCFS.  I am happy to say that he hasn't climbed on the bench since, but he has climbed on the couches and 80% of the time he gets down by himself just fine.  I'm not sure what to make of the other 20% when he "forgets" how to get down and just stands on the couch dancing...

It has been a very rough few days.  There have been many tantrums, including the one today.  He was upset (I believe due to being overtired) and didn't want to sit still for some books on his great-grandma's lap (mind you, he's the one who climbed up to her with the book in the first place).  So he got down and started throwing the books.  We don't treat books that way, so I started to collect them and put them in his toy bag.  He QUICKLY grabbed the last book before I could get to it and bent the cover backwards and then threw it at my head.  All the while he had this look on his face...I can't quite describe it.   Regardless, he's a handful.  I know that toddlers are known for their tantrums, their hi-jinx, and button-pushing, but I really think I have trouble here.  He's obviously also very "advanced" when it comes to these types of things as well...wonderful.

The boob tube

I love and curse the invention that is the television.  I love my HGTV and guilty pleasures like Desperate Housewives, all of which I wait to watch when B is in bed.  The American Pediatric Association says no TV for children under two years of age.  There are so many reasons given as to why this is and I agree, for the most part.  Children of any age shouldn't watch too much TV (or be on the computer or play video games); it's all about moderation.  There are too many older kids today that don't know how to play outside nor do they have the desire to go outside!  It's sad.  I can remember playing for hours and hours outside, during all of the seasons, even winter!  Even as a teenager I spent a lot of time outside, going biking or just sitting outside talking with my girlfriends.  Since this was my experience growing up, I just assumed that today's youth was the same way, boy was I wrong!  When I was teaching, I had made a comment to the last class of the day, saying "when you guys get home and go outside to play", I can't remember how the conversation started, but the looks I got you would've thought I had three heads!  The students then informed me that they would be going home to watch TV or play video games or go on the computer or a combination of all three.  YIKES!

So this brings me to B.  I don't want him plopped in front of the TV all day and I don't want him growing up thinking it's a vital part of his day.  I want him to think of it as something we might watch together once in awhile, a fun movie or a cute show.   So, even though B is under two, he has watched TV, and it only started recently.  We found Word World on PBS and I enjoy watching it with B once in awhile (we DVR it!).  When it's super hot outside or it's raining and we have played with every toy a million times, it's nice to just sit for 20 minutes and watch a show to break up the day.  We've recently discovered Mickey Mouse's Clubhouse (LOVE IT!) and Brendan LOVES it.  He loves Mickey, he barks at Pluto, and claps when they clap, and of course dances to the hot dog dance at the end.  So I've been recording Mickey Mouse.  I figure if he watches the 23 minute show once a day (in the morning while drinking his bottle of milk--his only bottle of the day) it won't kill him.  As soon as he sees Mickey on the screen, he breaks into a huge smile and bounces.  Once the show is over, the TV goes off (music goes on, I love Sirius on the TV) and stays off the rest of the day (unless I want to veg in front of it while he's napping and I want to pretend the laundry isn't sitting in a huge pile waiting to be washed).

Lately B has been wanting the TV on during other parts of the day.  He tries to grab the remote (it's out of reach) and then when I tell him we can watch TV again tomorrow morning he freaks out and throws a major temper tantrum.  He keeps going to the remote throughout the day and gets so upset when I deny it.  This scares me!  Why is he so addicted?!  Ugh, did I do something wrong?  He even takes his toy remote (old one) and tries to get the TV to turn on...  I'm not going to deny him TV all of the time, especially as he gets older (I can't wait to watch Disney movies with him!), but I don't want him to become a boob tube idiot!

Trying to turn on the TV with his remote.

This boy has a one-track mind!  My friend came to visit and spend the night this week and she brought a chocolate cake she had baked.  Brendan saw the cake when she got here and was obsessed with the cake the rest of the day.  That's what he pointed to during snack, during dinner (which he ate hardly anything), he just wanted the cake (not that I can blame him!).  He finally got some cake when we were done with dinner and he was so happy.  The next day he still saw the cake and wanted it instead of his breakfast and instead of his lunch.  I finally had to show him the cake was "all gone", by changing it's container and hiding it!

Hehehe, I win, I got cake!

Hidden Broccoli and Time-Out

Why was I even concerned that Brendan wasn't saying "no" yet?!  He's been practicing the word a lot, usually while playing by himself with his toys, it's his own little playtime mantra..."no? no! no?"...most of them sound like they are questions because he's practicing the new sound...  "uh-oh" is still his number one, go-to word...I'll take that over some other choice words that he hears on rare occasion...like damn.

Veggies have still been a struggle, but he did have about 5 green beans while having some pizza (his favorite food by far, followed by string cheese and hot dogs), so I'll take that small victory, even though it was more of a bribe meal...you can have another bite of pizza if you eat this green bean first...it worked!
To get those veggies in, at least the most important ones, like spinach and broccoli, I've been pureeing them with berries and bananas and then putting them in his oatmeal.  I freeze the puree into cubes and thaw 2 and mix it in with the oatmeal, which he has about every 3 days (Trader Joe's breakfast bar one day, Trader Joe's waffle with cinnamon sprinkled on top--B doesn't like syrup-- the other days).  And I still puree baby carrots and then add a cube into his applesauce.  I figure it's better than nothing.  I still put the veggies out so he sees them at dinner time, secretly hoping he'll go back to his old veggie eating ways.

Holy cow!  Yesterday was an awful behavior day.  I know that his canine teeth are really bothering him and you can tell that they'll be coming through sooner than later (why does it take sooooo long?!).  He didn't want to nap, he would fall asleep for about 20 minutes and then wake up screaming, huge tears everywhere.  A total of two 20 minute naps does not bode well...and it wasn't well.  The temper tantrums and the frustration were kicked up to high gear to the point where he was so mean and destructive!  Not my normal little Brendan.  He wanted my bookmark (how dare I read a few pages of my book on the couch while he was quietly playing by himself) and it had dangly beads on it and I decided that could be a bad equation, so of course he was upset that I denied him the bookmark.  He then grabbed my book (library book that is) and ripped 4 pages clear down the middle, stared right at me, as if daring me, then grabbed the book jacket and just held on tight, all the while staring at me.  He really has a death grip with those little heads, so it took some struggling to get the book and the ripped pages out of his hands.  Right then and there I decided it was a good time to start "time-out".  I set him on our wood bench in the entry way and he thought it would be hysterical to stand up and walk on it and almost dive off the edge.  So I had to keep sitting him down, which he thought was sooooo funny, which only made me seethe even more inside.  Maybe my angry face is funny looking?  I should look in the mirror some time and check.  I decided one minute was good for a 16 month old.  That was time-out #1.  Time-out #2 was because he got frustrated at his xylophone, so he threw it and then proceeded to destroy the play-area (where did this aggression come from!?  I haven't thrown anything else since that one incident--I swear!).  The bench wasn't cutting it, so we moved to his rocking chair (that has buckles on it!!!!) and I set the timer for one minute and went down into the basement and cried.  I don't even remember what time-out #3 was for, but by me being able to go into the basement for that one-minute it may have saved Brendan.  My mantra for the moment--this too shall pass, this too shall pass, this too shall pass.

Discovering Fun

B is finally nearing the age where we can take advantage of some of the fun exhibits and museums in the area.  We met a friend and her two boys at the Discovery Museum for some rainy day exploring.  B still doesn't get too much out of the excellent displays and interactive exhibits, but he can finally play with them and explore!  There was a Golden Book exhibit at the museum that cleverly incorporated some of the classic books into activity centers for the children.

B was able to look at some books...

...draw with chalk...

 ...play with trains...

...kiss a cow...

...and of course run up and down the ramp.














B did pretty well at the museum, which made me more confident in taking him other places like it.  As long as I have lunch ready for him in the car, he's happy.  It was also his first experience with baked cheetos (part of my lunch)...there was orange on his shoes, his legs, his shorts, his shirt, his forehead, his hair, his hands, his car seat...but he loved 'em!

Nothing like a jelly sandwich (he won't eat p.b.)

Nothing like orange cheetos for the car ride.

So many things

There are so many things Brendan is learning and doing for the first time, it's hard to keep track of it all!  Especially since so much of it is so darn fun and cute...

Brendan has been growing in leaps and bounds lately; physically, emotionally, and developmentally.  It's crazy to think he's becoming such a toddler and not my little baby anymore.  At 16 months he is trying so hard to talk and he does "talk", I just wish I knew what he was saying!  If he could just tell me what he was in the mood for when it comes to meals and snacks, it would be so much easier!!!  He now does "hoo hoo" for owl, and "hissss" for snake.  Every slide he sees is a "weee" and he has to point out every truck and car we pass.  Cars go "voom voom".  He waves hi and bye on command and blows kisses.  And will give kisses to his animals too.  He loves to hug both mom and dad, but his favorite is hugging us both at the same time, he could do it for minutes straight.  He can follow (but doesn't always choose to follow) so many commands it blows my mind!   He can go up and down the stairs by himself (down not as well) while holding onto the railing.  We can't get him to go down the safe way, backwards on his tummy.  He refuses!  We'll just have to keep trying.

My favorite moment of the month so far though, is when we went to lunch yesterday with my parents and grandparents.  Brendan had had enough of his high chair and food, so he went to go sit on my mom's lap.  Her plate still had some fries and ketchup on it.  Mr. Brendan decided to pick up a fry, look at it, then dip it ever so slightly into the ketchup and then took a bite.  No one has ever shown him how to do this, it was purely his observational skills from the times we've been out to eat.  He's never had ketchup before, so his face was quite funny at first, but he decided he liked it!  He went back for dip after dip into that ketchup pile and then started in on my fries and ketchup!  At one point he took the direct route and dipped his fingers right in and sucked off the ketchup.  But knowing Brendan, I'll give him something with some ketchup here at home and he'll refuse it!

Brendan is a very particular child.  He'll only drink out of Tommee Tippee sippy cups.  The blue ones has to have his milk in it and the green one has to have his water in it.  If you switch them, forget it, all bets off, he'll refuse his water, which is his favorite thing to drink all day!  I'm hoping that we can get him to drink out of a straw.  We keep showing him and having him try, but it's not his Tommee Tippee cups...

We've been going to the pool when we can, and when weather allows, and Brendan has been LOVING it, especially when it's time for a snack.  Today at the pool he wanted to jump in the water, with my help, over and over again.  At one point, he looked at me, then put his face right into the water and started to form his mouth to make bubbles, then looked back to me very proudly!!!  The last time anyone showed him that was during swim lessons weeks ago!  He remembered it and did it all on his own.  Then as we were walking through the shallow end to go to his beloved pirate boat water slide, a girl his age blocked the path.  She was staring at him and I told him to say hi, so he waved his hand at her and smiled.  God bless him...too cute.   I can't wait for him to be able to go down the mini water slide on his own though, I have a very bruised behind from hitting the bottom of the pool when we go down!

Small reminders

As Brendan is getting older it's amazing how much he takes in while observing our daily life.  It's amazing and scary at the same time.  We really have to watch how we act, react and what we say...we've been saying that, but now it's really true!

Brendan has observed chores for awhile now and without any prompting he jumps right in to help.  My little helper gladly picks crumbs off the floor and puts them in the garbage and he helps unload the dishwasher!  Yes, the dishwasher!  He picks up plates and silverware and actually hands them to me so I can put them away.  It's probably the cutest thing ever and makes me smile every time.  I actually look forward to emptying the dishwasher now, because it makes him so pleased to be helping me.

All of this observing and mimicking has a downside too, as I sadly found out.  Brendan was extra cranky a few nights ago and I had dinner dishes to clean up and food to put away.  Brendan kept bringing his toys into the kitchen and leaving them there.  I then kept tripping on the toys and stubbing my toes.  It was the end of the day and was getting extra cranky by the minute.  I slid on yet another toy and lost it (poor reaction #1), and Brendan chose that moment to throw another tantrum (a kicking, back arching, head banging into the floor tantrum), so I really lost it and started taking his toys and throwing them back into the living room (poor reaction #2).  Yes, I actually threw his toys, all the while Brendan carefully observing my very own tantrum.  No more than 30 seconds later, Brendan started picking up his toys and throwing them into the living room too.  That's when it REALLY hit me that he really does watch and pick up on EVERYTHING we do.  I felt awful, to say the least, about the poor example I had just set for my son.  So I sat down against the fridge and cried a little and my little observer came up to me, put his arm around my neck and patted my shoulder (his new thing when hugging us, he now pats our backs).  Which of course made me feel a million times better because obviously he'd observed us doing that to each other and to him before.  My almost 16 month old son was comforting ME.  Needless to say, I've really been watching how I react to everyday situations, trying my best to set a good example for Brendan, all it took was one small reminder.

Ahoy!

I signed Brendan up for 8 swim lessons, at the tune of $55, at the Woodstock Water Works.  It was a parent-tot program, where I got in the water with him.  We sang a lot of songs, worked on bubbles (B was clueless on the concept of blowing), played with toys, floated on our stomachs (this was okay), floated on our backs (this was not okay), and went down the kiddie pirate water slide (too many times to count).  Overall, I think it benefited Brendan and me.  he got to see other little kids in the water and got more exposure in the water and I know some things I can do with B when we're in the water, to help him even further.  We only ended up going to 6 of the lessons (sick and out of town), but it was still worth it!  On the last day of lessons, they allowed both parents to swim and we had free reign over the whole park.  I took B down the big curly water slide and he was indifferent.  You could tell he was unsure about it because he couldn't see the end and because we weren't going fast enough, he likes fast slides (who doesn't!?).  So we went on the "wheee" (as Brendan calls the mini pirate water slide) 50 times.  We even tried sending him down on his own, he doesn't quite understand the physics of a slide yet, that he needs to sit straight up and forward ever so slightly, so it didn't go too well.  We're going to the water park after his afternoon nap today, it should be interesting to see how he does with a lot of people around!

Eat your vegetables, please! Please? Pretty please?

Brendan has many new things happening with him lately, some are good, many are bad.  I'll start with a positive, as I did when conducting parent-teacher conferences, Brendan actually held my hand about 65% of the time when we went for a walk yesterday evening (huge improvement!).  On to the not so good (but not horribly awful either)...Brendan at almost 16 months old has found screaming.  Not the screaming due to crying, but the screaming because we are doing something to him that he does not want done (i.e. wiping face) or taking him away from something he wants (i.e. the remote or going into the street), I could go on.  He found the scream that is so high-pitched and loud that it makes you cringe and flinch.  The kind of scream that hurts your ears.  He takes pleasure in these screams as well, even when we have no reaction to them, he just keeps doing it because HE likes hearing it.  I just can't wait to hear this new-found scream in church, the store, the library...

Brendan's eating habits are confusing to say the least.  He once ate ANYTHING and EVERYTHING, up until about 2.5 months ago.  What happened?!   I was so proud that my son ate broccoli, green beans, sweet potatoes, spinach, carrots, peas, and not in puree form either...the real stuff!  Then all of a sudden, he'd only eat broccoli and green beans, I could live with that, but now it's nothing.  No vegetables.  It's such a horrible cliche about kids and not liking vegetables, but it's found its way into our house!  And I'm so desperate to get him his vegetables!  He eats fruits pretty well.  Meaning he'll eat a peach/pear fruit cup one day and then 3 days later spit out every piece of fruit or just plain out refuse to take a bite, then the next time I offer the fruit cup, he'll eat the whole thing and want more!  At least this kid will eat bananas, I think he eats a banana a day, so we've got that going for us!  So I've been trying to figure out how I can give him veggies.  Hmmmm, applesauce and pureed carrots wouldn't be awful, disguised with some cinnamon...so this morning I boiled some carrots, pureed them and we'll see if he'll eat his applesauce at lunch today.  I haven't figured out how I can get the green veggies into his other foods.  He loves pizza, so maybe I'll make a homemade pizza with tomato/sweet potato puree sauce, bits of broccoli, covered in his beloved cheese!  Hmmm, could be interesting.  I don't know if this borders on desperate or if I can call it being clever...

Mom, Ma, Hi

First I'd like to say that moms are not allowed to get sick.  It's just not right.  I am blessed enough to have a caring husband who helps out extra when I'm not feeling well.  But I still had to get my couponing in at Meijer and SuperTarget yesterday, someone had to do it!

Brendan is still wearing many hats, one minute he's Mr. Opposition, the next he's Mr. Flailing, and the next Mr. Screamo, and the next Mr. Maniac...

However, he did make me quite happy yesterday afternoon.  I begged Charlie to get up (he was sleeping, it was his "nighttime") and go change his diaper after his nap, because I was still so chilled and achey.  So Charlie did and I figured I better go in there and check my temperature (100.8).  Brendan had been crying and stopped when he saw me, but as soon as I stepped out of view behind Charlie, to grab the thermometer, Brendan started fussing again and said, clear as day, "mom?, ma?".  I was stunned and very disbelieving at the same time.  I've been waiting so long to hear him say ma or mom with meaning that I gave up all hope.  Especially since he had no trouble saying mooo for a cow and mo for more.  He's been walking around saying dada with meaning for a long time!  So I looked over at Charlie and he looked at me, and he said, I think that was a definite mom, and I still didn't believe it and thought it was a coincidence.

I then was driving to the stores and B was babbling away in the backseat, and I hear "ma? ma?", so I turn around (hoping he really meant me, because it tickled me pink!), and said "what Brendan?".  He then goes, "hi!".  I burst out laughing.  I was so happy and so excited.  And to top it off he said "weee" as we went down the hill on Haligus, which made me laugh even harder.  So far today he hasn't used "mom" or "ma", but I'll take what I can get!

So the moral of the story is that even though he's been a royal pain in the tukhas, he still makes me proud and quite happy.  He's my little ray of sunshine who ends up making me laugh several times a day with his crazy antics.

Cryin' in the shower

It's going to be one of those nights, that when I take a shower, I cry and cry and cry.  I was originally only going to talk about Brendan and his development and keep track of it on this blog, but I was naive and know that I need this outlet for EVERYTHING involving Brendan and my life.

I didn't think B was going to be so awful at 15 1/2 months (and yet so awesome at the same time).  He has become defiant overnight.  Changing his diaper is a nightmare.  He kicks so violently when trying to take off his shorts and diaper and while trying to put a diaper back on.  It's ridiculous.  I feel like I've tried every reaction to it...I've yelled (and then gotten mad at myself for yelling), I've ignored it completely (all the while getting bruises from being kicked so hard), I've shown him how it hurts mommy and it makes me sad (bring on the fake tears...that actually worked a few times).  I give up.  I just don't know what to do and that behavior is just the tip of the iceberg.  I thought I had some time until the "terrible twos"!!!  EVERYTHING is a major struggle.  When it's finally time for Charlie to get up (did I mention I friggin' hate him on midnights?!?!), it's dinner time and my patience has worn VERY thin.  I remind myself all day that I was able to keep my patience (98% of the time, except when pregnant) with 150 different kids each day while teaching, so I should be able to keep my patience with one tiny child.  Brendan loves to throw himself on the floor, and hitting his head on our hardwood floors, when upset and not getting his way.  I do love that I'm "tough" and can outride his tantrums, letting him be while he has them.  That's not the problem.  Well, not a problem when I'm just cooking dinner or doing something else around the house, but when I actually NEED him to get something done and accomplished and he doesn't cooperate, that's a different story.  After dinner today I decided to take him for a long walk in the stroller and when we got back we'd play with his outside toys.  I told him to get his shoes, which he did, but sitting him on the bench to get them on was a nightmare.  Screaming, arching, flailing, and kicking ensued.  For shoes!  Shoes!

I know that everything at this point is a test.  He's testing his limits, exploring cause and effect, I get that. But an entire day of it.  Day after day. (literally)  I. AM. GOING. NUTS.  I feel like a failure.  I feel awful if I do lose my temper and shout at him.  I feel awful that I WANT to spank him.  I feel overwhelmed.  And I only have one child!  What happens with two!?  Should we even have a second child?!  I can't bank on the fact that the second one would be more mellow.

Brendan didn't smile at me once during his bath tonight.  I feel like he hates me or is at least mad at me for not being a better mom to him.

Brendan is amazing for so many reasons too.  He loves exploring (we knew the name would fit the lil' guy we hadn't met yet), he loves to smile.  We get to share knowing looks while we eat together, just between mom and Brendan.  He LOVES to read.  He dances every time he hears music, even if it's a 10 second jingle on a commercial.  He's independent (good and bad).  He's observant.  He likes to hug his stuffed panda and bunny and then have me hug them too.  He sings while in his crib when he's trying to fall asleep.  I could go on and on.  I just needed a few quick reminders as to why I do this every day; why I love him so much.  I need to remind myself that if this is the worst I get from Brendan, then I am truly lucky (it can just be so hard sometimes though).  I have friends who lost their 9-month-old son last summer and I know others who are raising children who have illnesses or disorders that are beyond trying.

It's not just Brendan that's been overwhelming me.  I feel like our basement is never going to be finished, which means our garage is in a state of disarray, along with the rest of the house.  I feel like I should be reading parenting books (to give me some insight), or organizing, or cleaning, or weeding.  OR ANYTHING.  But all I feel like doing after days like today, is sitting and crying and drinking some wine.  I hate that I'm such a 'Type A' person who has so many real touches of OCD.

This is a much longer post than I intended, but I just kept writing.  It's probably disjointed and rambling and I don't really care.  Even though the English teacher in me wants to go back and proofread it, I'm not going to.  And yes, I ended my sentence with a preposition.  Ha!